Please To Shut The Fuck Up...
Monique | Wednesday, June 30, 2010 at 4:04AM The other day, whilst frolicking with the gays at Pride (I had a most outstanding time!), we had the severe misfortune of running into a fellow parent of a child in Caesar's class.
Her little girl showed him her balloon, he showed her his. She showed him the tattoo on the back of her hand, he showed her his tattoo on his face. She showed him her pinwheel, not having one of those himself, he immediately topped her with "I have a Baby Birthday!"
To which her mother replied: "Another one?"
How does one answer that stupid fucking question, exactly?
I did the only thing I could think to do at the time- Smile, nod and back away.
Yes, ya'll, we is indeed having us another one.
What difference does it make? Are we putting our hands in your pockets to support our brood? Did we ask you to babysit? Do you change their diapers, breastfeed them or kiss their owies?
What the hell happened to "Congratulations!" or "Ah, so you're not a virgin then?" once you get past two it's "Another one?"?!?!
Pregnancy opens you up to the weirdest shit! Unsolicited advice, old wive's tales that are crazier than my Mama, and my most favorite "rude" comment of all... "Oh my God, you look like you're ready to pop!!"
Pop you in the face with the back of my hand, you mean? Why yes, just how did you know? I may be all super cutesie woo woo and nothing but baby bump, but I will still cut you. Puerto Rican doesn't go away because I'm harboring a muffin in my oven.
The saddest thing is, we've virtually ALL been there. Someone said the dumbest shit you've ever heard, likely while you were pregnant.
So now, I have to know! What was the silliest/rudest/dumbest comment or question you ever received while probably in the worst mood to receive it?
Reader Comments (5)
We're on our 3rd baby & I keep getting rude comments. I also hear "ANOTHER ONE?" & "are you crazy?" "Do you own a tv?" & stupid other comments.
Little do they know, I went through fertility treatmets to have this baby. Like you said, I'm not asking them to feed my kids, babysit or change diapers.
Maybe because of our age we get these comments? I know you're in your 20s but you look really young! Either way, people should mind their own business!
Congrats again girlie! :D
Wow, It's been 6 years since I was pregnant, obviously you know me, but I still remember EVERY stupid thing that was said to me.
After any meal,
"well you definitely look stuffed."
"You ate all that? Doesn't look like you have much room."
From some other mom,
Woman: "where's your waddle?"
Me: "What waddle?!"
Woman: "every pregnant woman waddles, it comes with being pregnant."
Me: "Lady idk what you are talking about, but my ass doesn't waddle I prefer walking like a human not a penguin."
My doctor,
"You should blow dry your nipples so they build up a roughness for breast feeding."
"You are having a girl because of this....."
"You are having a boy because of this...."
"You are having twins, believe me."
Best one yet,
"If you sleep with your ass towards the moon you'll get a boy." O_O
I mostly get stupid comments from my boyfriend. How awesome is that? Everytime I eat large meals, its "Omg you are eating ALL that?" hes such sweet heart.
"Oh, your 3rd? eh, so you're getting your tubes tied right?"
righttttttt around your neck maybe But until then Im going to need for you to top trying to butcher my reproductive organs
*stop