Stages of Bedrest: A Photographic Essay With Words & Stuff Too
Monique | Friday, December 14, 2012 at 11:35AM 
Stage One: I Got This
Okay, Baby. We can handle this, no problem! No chores, no breaking up fights between your brothers, and no pants? Yeeeeeah, boy! We win!
Stage Two: LOL NOPE
What the hell is going on here!? They brought the fights into my room, Caesar threw wet toilet paper onto his ceiling, and Mercutio just asked me what a condom was! This is crap! I want out! These people need to LEAVE ME ALONE!
Stage Three: Mom I'm Booooooooored
It's too quiet in here. Where is everyone? Who stole my cookies? The Internet up here is soooooo sloooooow. I have no one to talk to. Can someone find my Final Fantasy X disc, please? Anyone? Hellooooooo?
Stage Four: No One Asked Me What I Wanted For Breakfast
It's lonely up here! I've been abandoned. Where's my husband? I need a hug. This is dumb.
Stage Five: I Could Be Dead And No One Has Cared Enough To Check On Me
Seriously. Where the hell did everyone go?
Stage Six: I Wonder What Outside Looks Like
If I jump out the window, will the pain of my broken legs distract me from the the fact that I'm having preterm contractions? Will I still be able to run? Because these jerks are just going to put me right back on bedrest if I can't.
Stage Seven: This Is All Your Fault
I know I own the uterus, and played an active role in your creation, but this has nothing to do with me and I blame you. *raspberry*
*Not Pictured*
Stage Eight: Fourth Nap Of The Day
Fine. Since no one loves me, and my uterus is aching and nobody even cares, I'm going to sleep. Again.
Reader Comments (9)
Oh goodness, that sounds about right! I have only had to deal with bedrest for two days before. My sister was on bedrest for MONTH with her pregnancies. ALL of her pregnancies. I feel sorry for anyone that has to do bedrest for more than a day at a time. No fun at all.
And this is all in one day? How long is this bedrest going to last? Where is your cell phone? Cause you are gonna need some texting possibilities and I can make myself available. And skype. And the kids may have to bring arts and crafts to you. lol. Not gonna make it.....
Stage 2 Rocked! It gets better. I have been fortunate to not have to have been on bedrest for long periods but that week here and there were dreadful!
Best. Post. Ever. And sooooooo true... oh how I loathed bedrest....
I was on bed rest for 3 months and it was the absolute worst time of my life. I sank into horrible depression and gained EIGHTY POUNDS. I definitely feel for you and I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this. Hugs to you and to your family. I wish I were closer because I'd come over daily to let you know that nobody has forgotten about you. That was the single most awful thing about bed rest. My world stopped while everyone else's went on and I was just....left. sucked. Maintain your sanity as long as you can, girl!
Oh man, I can't even imagine how frustrating that would be!!! Poor girl....
Monique, you are awesome. I've enjoyed your blog for quite a while and think the world of you and your family :)
Aww, I hope things get better. Love your photos!
I did bedrest for at least four weeks with three of my four pregnancies and oh my gosh, it was truly the most depressed I've ever felt. It just doesn't work for my personality, all that laying around and not doing busywork, especially when I have nesting hormones running amok. I feel your pain, and I really don't have any great suggestions other than to just read, read, read. All that helped me was to lose myself in other, more exciting worlds! But of course, with little kids around, it gets tricky to stay lost for too long before the madness all around you, that you can't DO anything about, gets to you. So I also suggest keeping stacks of kids books near you so that whenever a kid comes into your room you can read to them, too.
Your photos are hilarious, btw. Mine would have been of me with sad random tears trickling down my face as I stared helplessly at the dust and dirty laundry.