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« Then BabyCenter Broke My Heart | Main | Our Mostly Handmade Christmas »
Monday
Dec312012

Ringing In The New Year... Trepidatiously

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I think I made resolutions last year, but 2012 has been such a whirlwind that I can't remember what they might have been, and looking through the archives here just makes me a little weepy.

Every new year, I enter with renewed hope that life will just... get better. I know that doesn't happen without work, without positivity, without patience, without faith in something.

But some years I feel like I've completely exhausted my stores.

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2012 was one of those years.

It was as if we were constantly skittering on thin ice, afraid to move an inch and terrified of falling...

And how often we fell, just when we were sure we were gliding along smoothly. Though somehow, and the more I sit in retrospection, I don't know how it was possible, we didn't slip through the cracks, didn't drown in the freezing, beckoning waters directly below us.

We remained on the surface, teetering undoubtedly, and managed to push ourselves along again.

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As the hours wind and 2013 quickly approaches, I'm both apprehensive and anxious about what it will bring.

I can't deny that my mother is getting sicker, I'm getting older, we're having our last child whom I haven't stopped worrying over since his conception. We have the challenges of homeschooling, the same distance to cover to get to our beautiful, and now nine year old, Princess. And possibly, one final move to somewhere we actually want to be.

I know within the year, there will be fleeting moments of unbridled joy, and I am going to hold out hope for those.

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We'll keep working hard, and working together, and the challenges? We'll overcome eventually.

I am going to keep my faith where it belongs - in the people who bring light and color into my world.

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They won't let me go down without a fight, and we're geared to kick 2013's ass if we need to.

Happy New Year, friends! I hope it's a great one for all of us.

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